Spoonboy talks about sexism in the punk scene

northeast-first:

This is a really good essay, I highly suggest reading it.

If one day I can be half as eloquent as Spoons, or half as compassionate, I’ll be a happy non-gender-aligned individual.

I thought Spoons’ essay was pretty dead-on, and there’s definitely a lot in it that merits further discussion. I think this paragraph is a pretty good example of that:

And recognizing that our male dominated culture is fucked up doesn’t make you a self-hating man, either. When I first heard Bikini Kill, it was fucking thrilling. Hearing someone lash out against dominant sexist attitudes wasn’t exciting in some sort of “oh good for women, they’re standing up for themselves,” type of way. It was liberating to hear someone take on those traditional expressions of masculinity, because I hated the ways I was expected to act as a man. I hated the toughness and numbness that was expected from men, because I wanted to be able to express my emotions without fear of ridicule. I hated the predatory way that men acted towards women, because I wanted to be free to have meaningful relationships with women. Likewise, I hated the homophobia, because I wanted to have meaningful relationships with the men in my life. I see men around me all the time who refuse to show any signs of vulnerability for fear of appearing feminine, and they tend to cut themselves off emotionally from the world. It’s fucking sad. I see men all the time who only view their relationships in terms of conquest, and I can’t think of one of them who has a healthy emotional life. Breaking down ideas around male superiority and masculinity is absolutely in mens’ best interests. In a punk context, I can say with certainty that the scenes I’ve visited that were the most gender inclusive have always been the most exciting and thriving music communities. There’s nothing to be gained for men in maintaining the boy’s club.

I think I kind of disagree with the last line. I think members of privileged groups (in my case, cis-gendered men) have competing interesting in both maintaining and destroying the systems which privilege us. Like Spoonboy says in his article, there are plenty of punk shows in which 100% of folks in the bands are men. Basically, space is made for men at the expense of space for women. The fact that there’s disproportionate space for men in bands, on stages, and in basements seems to me to be a material benefit of sexism for cis-guys.

And yet, I think Spoonboy’s other points in the paragraph summarize why cis-men should strive to make more inclusive spaces. While our material interests are with the system that privileges us, I think our imaginative interests lie elsewhere. My first experience with feminism was through riot grrrl— a Baltimore-based band called Die Cheerleader Die played at a skaterink in the Western, more rural part of my home county and totally blew me away, and like Spoonboy my discovery of bands like Bikini Kill (and, not to mention the politics, experiences, and viewpoints that animated them) was a watershed moment in my life; the politics of anarchism, feminism, etc. ignited an ebullience in me that convinced me that unjust systems which deal white, middle-class, cis-men like me to the top are still worth resisting. The joy, meaning, and purpose that come with struggling for a new world can convince privileged people to loosen their grip on oppressive systems and cast their lot with the struggles of oppressed and less privileged folks.

Challenging, destroying, and replacing systems of privilege and oppression is a profoundly creative project, and while those most affected/most oppressed should be allowed a central space in this currents, even those of us materially invested in oppressive systems do have much to gain in probing our imaginations to create more equitable, liberatory social arrangements designed to better meet everyone’s needs.

(Source: nodivision)